Publisher's Synopsis
Toby Wentworth's life is a mess-no, scratch that-an absolute catastrophe. Between juggling school, his job, the demands of a social life, and the enormous, crushing weight of a secret he's not ready to share, Toby feels like he's spinning plates while blindfolded. Oh, and did I mention he's very, very gay? So deep in the closet, he might as well be living in Narnia with Mr. Tumnus and the gang.
But life has a twisted sense of humor. Enter him: the guy from Toby's calculus class who has the audacity to wink at him during a lecture. The guy who now happens to be his partner for an important project. That single wink opens a floodgate Toby can't close. Suddenly, he's preoccupied with this boy-obsessively, relentlessly, maddeningly. Every glance, every conversation, every shared smile leaves Toby's heart pounding and his mind spiraling into endless "what-ifs."
Toby tries-he really does-to keep his carefully constructed life together. But between school deadlines, work pressures, unexpected dramas, and his Olympic-level ability to overthink everything, things are starting to unravel. And the worst part? He can't stop thinking about that boy. Not when it feels so impossible, so forbidden, and yet so right.
There are moments Toby wants to hate himself for these feelings. For wanting something that feels just out of reach. For craving a romance he knows he might never have. But there's also something exhilarating about the madness-about the possibility of him. It's the kind of trouble that leaves his stomach in knots, his head spinning, and his heart whispering, What if?
And trouble, Toby is learning, sometimes comes with the sweetest rewards.
So dive into Toby's story-a coming-of-age tale of self-discovery, heartbreak, and hope. Because sometimes, finding yourself starts with falling for someone who makes you feel seen for the very first time.
