Publisher's Synopsis
LOVE IN FORMALDEHYDE: Forty-four, single and childless, an eyelash stylist in Los Angeles faces the challenges of dating in the modern era of digital love. Her experiences guide her to the deeper questions of what human connection and love truly are. Love In Formaldehyde is an honest, funny, irreverent look at dating in the digital age. Thirteen chapters capturing comic snapshots of one woman's search for love in Los Angeles: the highs, the lows, the sauna confessions, the fast food first dates and the strap ons... Floating in the high digital seas and surrounded by men named Slim Pipe, Alien Candy and Suck Me, she's wearing a life jacket, holding a sign with bright orange letters that says: CAN WE TALK WITHOUT YOU SENDING ME A PICTURE OF YOUR DICK? OR TALKING ABOUT HOW GREAT YOUR ASS IS? IF SO, CALL ME.Above the neon wilderness of Sunset Boulevard, Sandi lives in a quiet bungalow set in the Hollywood Hills of Laurel Canyon. She's a successful eyelash stylist with her own private studio in West Hollywood. Through her work on women from all walks of life, including Oscar winners, princesses, Beverly Hills housewives and rock stars, Sandi has a unique window into the personal lives of her clients. In her studio, a love-safe space without judgement, they share their trials and tribulations regarding life, dating and romance. She quickly becomes not just their beauty expert, but a neutral sounding board and therapist as well. Constantly learning and gaining insight through her glimpses into the lives of others, Sandi starts to face the bigger questions that beg into surface. What is love? Is it just a chemical reaction in the brain? A momentary high like when you've eaten an edible and you just want to have a massive love orgy? Is she looking for happiness? Wanting connection? How did all this make sense? Especially in an age dominated by social media, disposable dating and a culture obsessed with swiping their way through life? Everyone seems so connected. But are we? Encouraged by her clients and friends, Sandi takes a leap of faith and dives into the abyss of online dating, signing up for Match, Hinge, Tinder and Bumble. She soon finds her dating experiences to be extremely offbeat, underlined with strong currents of light and dark humor. She encounters a record executive who insists on taking her out on dates using only Groupons. She wonders if they would be going on that all inclusive trip to Tahiti with airfare included for $1499? Will a Groupon wedding be in her future? She meets a struggling actor who takes her on a date which also turns out to be his job: rating and reviewing fast food restaurants.She later finds out he lives in his car, and sleeps in the parking lot at the Rock and Roll Ralphs on Sunset and Gardner. Then there is the film director, a.k.a. the Sociopath in the Sauna, who uses her sauna as a confessional to discuss and divulge his fears about Hollywood. Every time he gets in the hotbox, he always starts out by saying that he's been a very, very bad man. She also meets a pin pushing acupuncturist who consults a pendulum to make life's decisions. She invites him over to her place for a quick meet to see if there's any chemistry, but before long his pendulum is out and he's giving her a psychic reading which concludes someone was murdered in her home! Through her experiences, Sandi begins to realize that maybe everyone is quite simply searching for love; that common core of everything human which can only be found on the mysterious pathways of genuine connection. But, in a world where information travels in seconds and the idea of instant connection appears to be a modern reality, how have these things affected us? Is this ability to connect with one another genuine or a hopeful illusion?
