Publisher's Synopsis
Why a book on being Happily Married?I have been married to my caring and loving wife for fifteen years now and have two beautiful and smart kids. We have a nice house and a car. We go on vacations, eat awesome food. Life could never have been better. We have achieved an ideal life as per the society but are we really happy in our marriage? That is a very difficult question when I ask myself or even my wife. This made me introspect and question, why happiness evades us, even when, we do everything, we have been told to do, as good Samaritans by our elders, religion and our society. Why are so many people either not ready to get married or are filing for divorce? Why is there a rise in number of domestic abuse cases? Why are so many children running away from home, getting addicted to games or trying to escape their home through intoxication? Why are helpless children suffering because of broken marriages or single parents what did they do wrong? Why are so many children getting abused within their home and their parents don't even know about it? Why are married people committing suicide due to loneliness and depression?What is in the book?There are four sections in each chapter of the book.1.first section is a self-assessment (do it as honestly as possible), 2.the second section has a short story (based on real life stories)3.the third section is about analyzing the story through questions4.the fourth section has practical action points, that couples can do to improve their marriage.I have shared tried and tested ways to reduce the friction or pain that married couple face. I believe we need to first reduce the pain and then think of achieving pleasure or happiness in a marriage. This is not a "Feel happy in marriage quick tips" kind of a book. This book has stories and exercises, some of which, I have learnt and imparted in my almost 19 years of corporate training career. Every time I trained a Manager to lead teams better, I wondered if the same rule can apply in personal relationships. When I trained on Conflict Management and Negotiation for Win-Win, I wondered, if we can achieve Win-Win in really tough business negotiations then why can't we negotiate successfully at home.Well, I have arrived to a very interesting conclusion and that is if you know these communication, introspection and interpersonal skills well and apply these techniques, you will not only be successful in your marriage but also your career and life.I suggest you read this book and practice the suggestions through the action points after every chapter. I also request you to be patient, Rome was not built in a day and without consistent hard work and neither will your marriage. Marriage is a man-made institution and settling down is also not very natural, this is why frustration, depression, anxiety and boredom are the side-effects of marriage, having said that, Marriage is also not a bad thing since it has really amazing physical and psychological advantages such as: security, certainty, comfort, support and companionship. If handled well can also provide long lasting Happiness!Living a Happily-Married life depends on our definition of happiness, the real catch here is that the definition of Happiness keeps changing with time. As we age, earn more money, accumulate more stuff, get kids, buy a house and a car, our needs and desires change, so does our expectations from life. We get disappointed when we do not get what we expect from ourselves and others and these expectations also keep growing with time, this leads to feeling discontent with ourselves, our situation and others. These disappointments may manifest into depression, anger, quarrels, arguments, intoxication, depression, divorce or even suicide. Find out how we can manage these feeling and even turn them around through easy action steps.
