Publisher's Synopsis
Learn how to accept who you are without needing the conditions of approval or acceptance from others or perceived societal, religious or familial norms or measuring sticks. Do you remember playing the game "She loves me, she loves me not" to determine if your new crush returns your affection? This memorable childhood experience symbolizes the love we have, or do not have, for ourselves. As the reader, you discover you do not need to play the game to determine if you can love yourself without agonizing over certain conditions. This unique model explains the toxic relationship between shame and self worth and how shame interferes with your ability to accept yourself without conditions. The measuring stick is not needed or useful for self acceptance. The illusion of perfectionism is shattered so we welcome the learning experience instead of self loathing. The antidote to overcome perfectionism, the need to judge and compare, is shared in "I love me...I love me not." Three different models are presented to explain and assist in application of the principles shared. The Zendardi Self Worth Model, derived from Greg's personal experiences and experiences as a therapist, is the first model. This model exemplifies how shame impacts the sense of worth. The second user-friendly model is a cognitive model for the reader to see how beliefs and thoughts lead to feelings and behavior. If we want to change undesired feelings or behaviors, we must change our beliefs and thoughts. This model helps the reader to understand how to eliminate shame messages to find self love and acceptance. The final concept is a new approach known as Mind Body Bridging. Sometimes when we attempt to change our negative thoughts, they persist even more. Mind Body Bridging brings understanding to work through stubborn negative thoughts through simple mindfulness techniques. The reader will learn how to complete maps on shame and learn a different way of coping with shame.
