How to Be a Footballer

How to Be a Footballer

Paperback (30 May 2019)

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Synopsis

**Winner of the 2018 Telegraph Sports Book Awards Sports Bestseller of the Year**

'Very funny on almost every page, wonderfully self-deprecating and very sharp on the ludicrous behaviour of the modern player' - Sunday Times

'The funniest man in British sport' - Metro

Featured on BBC Radio 2 with Chris Evans

You become a footballer because you love football. And then you are a footballer, and you're suddenly in the strangest, most baffling world of all. A world where one team-mate comes to training in a bright red suit with matching top-hat, cane and glasses, without any actual glass in them, and another has so many sports cars they forget they have left a Porsche at the train station. Even when their surname is incorporated in the registration plate.

So walk with me into the dressing-room, to find out which players refuse to touch a football before a game, to discover why a load of millionaires never have any shower-gel, and to hear what Cristiano Ronaldo says when he looks at himself in the mirror.

We will go into post-match interviews, make fools of ourselves on social media and try to ensure that we never again pay £250 for a haircut that should have cost a tenner. We'll be coached and cajoled by Harry Redknapp, upset Rafa Benitez and be soothed by the sound of an accordion played by Sven-Goran Eriksson's assistant Tord Grip. There will be some very bad music and some very bad decisions.

I am Peter Crouch. This is How To Be A Footballer. Shall we?

Can't get enough of Crouch? Tune into That Peter Crouch Podcast on Radio 5 Live

About the Publisher

Ebury Press

Ebury Press

Including memoir and popular history, cookery and humour books, travel-writing, sport, music and reference, Ebury Press publishes across the range of popular non-fiction. Combining books from household names – – such as Caitlin Moran, Yotam Ottolenghi, Madhur Jaffrey, Danny Wallace, Annabel Karmel, Dave Gorman, Stuart Maconie, Delia Smith and Pam Ayres - with work from the newest talents, Ebury Press has a reputation for publishing bestsellers in almost every genre of commercial non-fiction.

Book information

ISBN: 9781785039782
Publisher: Ebury Publishing
Imprint: Ebury Press
Pub date:
DEWEY: 796.334092
DEWEY edition: 23
Language: English
Sales rank: 2653
Number of pages: 293 , 8 unnumbered of plates
Weight: 228g
Height: 128mm
Width: 196mm
Spine width: 20mm